


Local Couple Constantly Mistaken For Lawyers

by abbeytre3



Series: Why Did I Make These Friends [3]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Fluff, M/M, tumblr influenced me so much
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-07
Updated: 2017-06-07
Packaged: 2018-11-10 00:48:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11116407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abbeytre3/pseuds/abbeytre3
Summary: Decided to just go for itThomas and Alex and their... shenanigans





	Local Couple Constantly Mistaken For Lawyers

“Alex look. I think we should—”

Thomas looked down as a hand popped out from beneath the sheets.

Alex grinned cheekily, “Is this your card?” He placed the ace of spades on top of Thomas’s chest.

Thomas gaped, “Oh holy shit yes.”

Giving a rough chuckle Alex pulled himself up next to Thomas’s ear and whispered, “I told you I was magic in the bedroom.”

 

 

Pushing a cart in the grocery store, Thomas again tried to broach the topic with his Alex, “Hamilton. This is really a problem—”

Alex turned from his spot down the aisle and screamed, “Jefferson! I said KRAFT or VELVEETA”

Suitably distracted Thomas sprinted to Alex’s side and snatched the Velveeta Mac and Cheese, “Kraft is for Jupiter to get more stupider, Velveeta goes to college, to get more knowledge.”

Alex squinted, “Is ‘more stupider’ proper grammar?”

“Is your face?”

Alex puffed up, “I’ll let you know Mr. Jefferson, that my face is perfectly grammatically correct. Now that the case has been settled, why not Kraft? Powder has to be healthier then sauce.”

Jefferson began piling boxes of Velveeta into the cart, “Objection! The weak watery stuff that comes out of the powder is akin to sin.”

“Not only are we now bringing religion into the courtroom but rhyming too! You are a man of many talents Mr. Jefferson.”

“Excuse me!”

Both men turned and faced an older lady, her salt and pepper hair more salt these days. Her foot tapping impatiently she motioned at their cart. “While you young gentlemen have been restocking for your office, you have been blocking the whole aisle. I don’t know what they taught you at Harvard or wherever, but improper restraining is precisely the reason we need you fellas.”

Thomas’s cheeks colored when he realized that between the shopping cart and their arguing, they had barricaded the pasta aisle. Muttering his apologies, he hauled the cart over to the side, wincing at the squeal of the stuck wheel.

He turned to face Alex, who was chewing on his lip rather distractingly, “What’s up?”

Alex started, opening his mouth then clamping it shut fiercely, then began again, “Did she just- Harvard? Jefferson don’t laugh but… did she think that we are lawyers?”

Thomas snorted, “You just now figured that out? I keep trying to bring this up.” He steered Alex back towards the cart so they could face the tortuous Target check out line, “You know how in pubic we refer to each other by last names, just as a sort of joke?”

Alex nodded, “Yes?”

“And that we have rather involved discussions sometimes?”

Alex hummed to show that he was following along. God, he was so cute sometimes Thomas couldn’t help but bemoan that they were in public.

“Well, last week, at the florists. Picking up James’ order for John. Remember that?”

Alex kicked his feet a little in the line and picked up the thread, “I called you my partner and the assistant asked how long we had been in form together? I don’t really know. I tune out pleebs when they start talking nonsense.”

“Well that’s very Machiavellian of you. But she said ‘firm’ not form. She thought we were law partners. What were we discussing when you entered the shop?”

“Medicare, doesn’t matter anymore, I’m still right… but ohmygod. We totally have to run with this!” Alex did a little skip into the air, completely willfully ignorant of the annoyed stares.

“Alex! Alex no!”

“Alex yes!”

 

 

 

“Hi Hamilton and Jefferson”

“Jefferson and Hamilton” Thomas quickly corrected.

Alex whispered through gritted teeth, “I thought you didn’t care?”

“I care a great deal. Mostly about how _illegal_ this is!”

Thomas grinned at the confused couple, “Hamilton and Jefferson. What do you need.” A sharp elbow to the side corrected him, “I _mean_ , what may we two humble lawyers help you with today?”

The couple eyed him oddly then turned to the shorter of the duo, “We were wondering if we should sue and wanted to contact someone for advice. You know, before hiring an attack lawyer.”

Alex mumbled to Thomas, “oOh my god. She’s using Yu-Gi-Oh terminology.” Then continued at a normal volume, “And what advise do we need to um advise on?”

The women put her hand on her partner’s arm, “Lucy here was very startled at the zoo the other day.”

“Cindy no.” The other women protested softly.

Cindy looked firm, “No. they have to know. Now, a lion roared at his exhibit. And poor Lucy was so startled that she dropped her ice cream onto her brand-new blouse. It cost over two hundred you know. Only the best for my Lucy.”

Thomas knew Alex was about to lose it. Either go off about wasted taxpayer money or start cackling. He tugged him to a standing position and into the hallway with a mumbled excuse about convening to the couple.

As soon distance was between them, Alex bent over with wheezing laughter. “We have to let them do it. We have to.”

“No Alex, they have no case.”

Alex turned his large eyes and stared pleadingly at Thomas, “Please? It’ll be hilarious. They’ll either get shot down so hard or walk out with a hundred thousand. No bad options for us! Not like, not like,” he gasped another laugh, “Not like we’re actual legal counsel or anything!”

Thomas looked down in concern at the now seriously unable to breathe Alex. “Hamilton? Alex? Is it your lungs? C’mon don’t do this now. Today is supposed to be a fun day!”

Thomas dialed 911 with shaking fingers and scooped Alex up, rushing past the eternally confused couple.

 

 

 

“So this all happened because you wanted to play lawyers?!” John shouted in Thomas’ face.

Alex waved from the hospital bed, breathing tubes swishing back and forth, He nasally but cheerfully retorted, “I. _I_ wanted to play lawyers. Don’t give him credit for my ideas!”

James let out a soul releasing sigh and dropped his head into his hands. “Can we just— why? This is such a bad idea. Where’s Hercules? He’s the one that has to put up with Alex for the rest of his natural life.”

Thomas put a hand on his shoulder, “But Jemmy. You’re the one who has to put up with me.”


End file.
